Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Project Runway 9, Episode 5: LIAR!

So much to say about this episode, only so many electrons in the universe with which to say it. Because I can't say it all, don't forget to read Tom and Lorenzo's recap.

The Challenge
A week after designing for Nina, now they're designing for Heidi. I guess no one else wants to be associated with the show. I hate these challenges. They exist for no other reason than for Heidi to exploit the designers for some cheap/free design work. Wise up designers, it's not "an honor to have your design made and sold on Amazon." You've just been used for free labor.

Yes, Cecilia dropped out. Thank god. Would she have saved Julie if she had said she wanted out during the runway judging the previous day? I don't think so. I think the judges still would have booted Julie and made Cecilia drop out on her own.

With Cecilia gone, Olivier and Viktor got to choose who returned of the 4 previous aufed designers, all clearly huddling together in the reject suite at the Atlas. They chose Joshua C. Meh. He's likable enough as a character (because he IS Tobias Fünke), but let's face it, none of the 4 aufed designers had any chance of advancing very far.

As previously state, team challenges exist to create villains and drama. Putting them on teams of three sets each team up for a two against one scenario. And that's what we got. Go producers! You know how to make... erm... TV that no one really wants to watch...

The Winners?
Joshua M. and Viktor both won. (Head scratch...) Why? Because Heidi wanted to get as much free labor out of this episode as possible. Let's face it, if she'd wanted to, she could have made everyone a winner and rushed them all into production. There were going to be as many winners as salable garments that came down that runway.

The Bert
Let's see... Bert had problems on a team with Viktor. Bert had problems on a team with Anthony Ryan. Surely Bert is not the common denominator here. Surely he is the saint and everyone else is difficult. Poor Bert. He wouldn't hurt a fly.

The Great Big Fat Hypocritical Liar Heidi Klum
As soon as Heidi started arguing that Anthony Ryan should be out because his baggy explosion outfit was the worst and "one day you're in, the next day you're out" I started yelling at the TV. Do you not remember just a few challenges ago when every judge agreed that Bryce's wee-wee pad dress was the worst and yet still somehow Joshua C. went home? Or all the countless other times that line has been a total load of bullshit? If it were "one day you're in, the next day you're out" YOU WOULDN'T GET IMMUNITY WHEN YOU WIN A CHALLENGE!!! All I can say is, thank god they sent Danielle and her world of poorly sewn chiffon home. If they had aufed Anthony Ryan, I would have cancelled my cable.

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